One of the most enjoyable perks of performing for children, is the list I've compiled of delightful children's quotes. Check back often for more gems.
Girl: Do you know my dad's band?
Duke: What's the name of his band?
Girl: I can't tell you. It has a naughty word in it.
While packing up after a show, I was hat-less and a girl wandered back in to talk to me. She was very sweet and there was not a hint of cruelty in the way she told me her honest opinion: "I liked you better with your hat on."
Duke: "Here's your tambourine."
Girl: "My name's not Marine. I'm Emma."
A little girl recently asked me, "What's your real name again?" I whispered to her, "Noah." Her face lit up with joy and shocked delight; then tilted her head and made certain she heard me correctly: "Snowball?!?!" Needless to say, she walked away a little disappointed...
Little Boy: "Who are your parents?"
Duke: "Don and Esther."
Little Boy: "Hmmmm...Never heard of them."
Duke: What kind of dog do you think I have?
Girl: A Vegetarian?
At the end of my show during Q&A--and after a few questions had already been answered--a little boy asked politely: "um...uh....um...uh....could you...uh...um...hurry up a bit? I have a swimming lesson."
After playing "Creepy Crawly Love" I asked the kids in what way I should have told the girl that I liked her rather than throw worms at her. I received the usual responses of "write her a letter," "buy her a ring," "give her flowers," "just tell her!" and "kiss her."
Then, this suave, 9-year old boy raised his hand and said in the most cool and calm manner, "Let her come to you, man."
More practical advice from the "Creepy Crawly Love" question, this time from a very serious boy:
"Stare at her until she comes over by you and asks, 'Why are you staring at me?' "
"Do you have a man cave, or a lounge, or a studio where you write your songs?"
- 7-year old boy
During "Good Good Jobby Bird" today at Sharon Library, the kids got to use their imaginations and fly to wherever they wanted. After the song I asked them where they went. The very first boy (about 6) said, "Vegas!"
"Because of your song, I learned to love eating Brussels sprouts!" -young boy
...and then there are moments like today after my Walworth Library show:
Little Girl With Blonde Hair: "I love you!....Hug!"
Duke: Does anybody know what "entomology" is?......It is the study of.....?"
6-year old Boy: "Entomology is entomology and nothing will ever change that."
Duke: What should I have done differently rather than throw a worm at a girl to show her I liked her?
8-yr Old Boy: Write her a message on the worm.
Then, after the show the same boy approaches me:
Boy: "For the animal song, I wanted you to sing 'wife.'"
Duke: "Oh yeah? What sound does a wife make?"
Boy: (in a high-pitched voice) "Honey!"
"Duke Otherwise is my favorite singer...after Johnny Cash."
-Olive, 9
Post-concert critique from a 2nd grader today at Waller Elementary:
"I wish you would've played heavy metal."
Duke: "These songs come from my silly brain. Does anybody here also have a silly brain?"
Pretty Little 3-year old Girl: "I don't have a brain under my hair."
After the final rambunctious dance number at last night's show, a small boy with severe wet-from-sweat head approached me:
"Can I borrow your hat? I want to wipe my head with it."
Duke: How did that song make you feel?
6-year old boy: It made me feel so laughy that I had to sneeze.
3rd grade Boy: Do you play country music?
Duke: Not really.
Boy: You look country with your hat.
Duke: This is a fedora, not a cowboy hat. (Of which I remove my hat to show them and put it back on my head. Much unexpected laughter from the whole group.)
Boy: Can you take off your hat again? (I do. Much laughter once again.)
3rd grade Girl: Put it back on!!! Put it back on!!!
Duke: "This next one is about your favorite food!"
An adorable and gentle little 4-year old girl raises her hand... "My dad's favorite food is beer."
A cute 1st-grader told me this today after my show. (She was very sweet in telling me. She was not mean or bratty, but rather matter-of-fact.)
Girl: "You were doing that stuff on purpose to make the other kids laugh."
Duke: "Yup, I was."
Girl: "I don't laugh at that kind of stuff."
"I didn't get up to dance because I'm a princess."
Duke: What would you do if you were face to face with a cheetah?
Kid: I'm from Chicago so I can't say out loud what I would do.
